Identity Crisis during Snowpocalypse 2014

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I had a dream my purse was stolen.  It was an awful dream where I realized I had no money, no phone, no driver’s license, no keys.  No one knew who I was and I couldn’t call for help. I was no one.

This dream happened after three days of being unable to leave the house after a snowstorm blanketed Wichita with 8.5 inches of snow, and the city was slow to clear the roads making road travel impossible. So I wasn’t able to go to my volunteer job at the Red Cross. My husband went to work leaving me alone with the cats for hours on end.

I was really bothered by this dream….until I forgot about it. Then this article in the WSJ showed up inexplicably and I remembered the dream: After Divorce or Job Loss Comes the Good Identity Crisis – WSJ.com.

I am relieved to know that my ongoing mood swings, negativity or irritability, and inexplicable emotions could be that I’m still reeling from losing my dream job when we moved. And mostly my resentment towards housework.

moo mouseI didn’t realize that my whole conception of my value as a person hinged on what I do to occupy my waking hours.

I have tried to be crafty on Etsy. And I’m trying to be a “blogger.” I’ve expanded my cooking repertoire and my kitchen confidence has indeed grown.  I have researched countless trivia to keep my mind active.

But for me this doesn’t really cut it compared the daily routine of having meaningful work to fulfill your life’s purpose.

I’m currently trying to embrace that I’m a Highly Sensitive Person as well as an Introvert (Just read Quiet by Susan Cain). I’ve been more selective of people I bring into my life to shield myself as recommended by HSP experts and Cain. So my friendships are limited currently.

It doesn’t take much analysis to see that loss of my social network has probably contributed to feelings of isolation and loneliness, especially during a blizzard. What confounds me at least is my continued anxiety about not having a job and the stress of not liking Wichita. I’m not sure why I still haven’t acclimated, but this WSJ article does shed some light on why I’m still out of sorts.

If you have tips or experiences to share about moving or relocating difficulties, I’d love to hear about them. Leave a comment below!

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